I just finished reading a post by Sarah Nun and it got me to thinking about something I have hashed over in my head many, many times.
It's the feeling that you are completely ordinary.
It is probably my biggest fear. I know there are worse things in life, but to be told there is nothing extraordinary about you? Well that stings. I don't know this from personal experience, no one has ever told me that I'm just plain ordinary, but at times I feel it very strongly (like when people have nothing else to say about me other than I am a nice girl).
I remember watching the movie American Beauty, these lines hit me every time:
Angela: Yeah? Well at least I'm not ugly!
Ricky: Yes you are, and you're boring and totally ordinary and you know it.
Angela: I don't think that there's anything worse than being ordinary.
I have been striving lately to let the extraordinary come out. Everyone has it within themselves, though it is hard sometimes to let it go. Between John encouraging me and Jillian showing me, I think I just might get their someday.
Until then, here's to letting go.
1 comment:
Thia is good, and completely true, I feel the same. Especially when a person is at home with children and never gets out, the feeling of not knowing who you 'ARE' and not having anything to offer anyone is very strong, I deal with this as well as you. But like you said, having your husband and friends by your side, encouraging you along the way keeps me on the upside.
This is one of the reasons i change things about myself so often. (Hair mostly) I HATE looking like everyone else. Right now most of my friends have gotten their hair cut short after years of having it long, and for once in a VERy long time i have my hair long. Always differant its the only way to go i think.
And by the way i think you ARE very extraordinary. You are so very talented with your photography and you were always giving you 110% with your work.
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